Trauma
Nice Doesn’t Always Mean Safe: Why Adoptees Need More Than Kindness to Thrive
Are you surrounding yourself with people who are nice—or people who are safe? It’s a question that often stops people in their tracks. For adoptees, especially those in transracial families,…
Read MoreBeyond Words: How Unspoken Moments Create the Deepest Opportunities for Healing
There is a particular kind of comfort that comes from being understood without explanation. As an adoptee and a psychologist, I’ve seen firsthand how powerful this unspoken understanding can be…
Read MoreChocolate, Starfish & Your Genuine Worth: A Crucial Lesson Learned as an Adoptee
As adoptees, we often have a strong desire to contribute to the world in significant ways in order to prove the worth of our existence to others. This frequently manifests…
Read MoreThe Bedtime Narrative for Kids Who Struggle with Sleep Anxiety
Throughout the years, I’ve had a number of requests for support from adoptive parents who are struggling with their child’s sleep anxiety. It’s an all-too-familiar scenario: “They refuse to let…
Read MoreSeven Hidden Harms in Performative Racial Allyship
If you are white, it may be easy to view performative racial allyship as benign. It’s short-lived and superficial nature does not look much different from other trends – a…
Read MoreThe Single Item that Made Me Understand Racism
It was a Band-Aid. Well, not actually a Band-Aid – just the image of a Band-Aid. So small, yet so damaging. It changed my life – the entire way I…
Read MoreIt’s Time to Expand the Definition of “Helpers”
After tragic events such the two mass shootings in El Paso and Dayton this past weekend (and the numerous shootings prior), many parents are seeking the right words to reassure…
Read MoreWhat We Ask of You
Understand that we do not ask you to hear our voices because we are grieving. We ask you to hear our voices because we are exhausted from grieving. Biologicals cannot…
Read MoreThe Most Empowering Book I’ve Ever Read to My Child
So, you know how most children’s books have that “happily-ever-after-suddenly-everyone-is-best-friends-even-though-the-entire-book-was-about-someone-treating-someone-else-like-crap” kind of vibe? I’ve never been a fan. Sure, I’m all for books with happy endings. But I don’t think…
Read MoreA Letter to My Adopted Child’s Teacher
The beginning of the school year is here! How will you help your child’s teacher understand the best ways to be sensitive to the needs of your adoptive child? Consider…
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